Friday, August 10, 2012

Why I Can't Update You on the Progress of Your Neighbors Home.

Why I Can't Update You on the Progress of Your Neighbors Home.

Ever since the first days of my real estate career over 25 years ago, the questions most asked of me after meeting a new or old acquaintance are "How are you?" followed by, "How is Real Estate?"

So naturally it comes as no surprise to me when a good friend will ask me to "fill" them in on what's happening with a home that is on the market or is pending.     People are always curious about the happenings in their "hood", but you know what, as much as I love you and as much as I would love to "dish" with you, I can't.     I can't because I have a serious fiduciary relationship with those folks that are selling or buying their home through me.   Regardless, it just isn't right.

And, if I am not their agent and don't owe that confidentiality to them, then I probably don't know the inside details of what is going on in that transaction.    It would simply amount to gossiping....

....and, while I love to solve the problems of the world with my friends over a glass of wine, to do so in this case would be purely and simply unprofessional. 

When representing either a buyer or a seller, an agent has a fiduciary relationship to that client.

What does that mean?

In a nut shell that means that we owe those clients our confidentiality and loyalty, and not put our personal interests above theirs.

Basically, not to talk about their stuff!    It's a very serious thing.   Not to be taken lightly.
So while I might love to answer your questions, I can not tell you what those folks are accepting for their home.   I can not tell you what happening during the inspection and the like.

Please respect our friendship.  Don't ask your Realtor friend for the inside scoop!

I would sooner tell you what I weigh!    AND,  You know that's not going to happen!  


About the author

Carol-Ann PalmieriCarol-Ann Palmieri, a full time Real Estate professional in Massachusetts for the past 24 years along with Al Mussi have helped hundreds of families find, sell or purchase new places to live.

A former US Marine, she grew up in Walpole, MA...  is committed to the serving the community through various volunteer opportunities.   She attended MA Bay Community and Suffolk University and is committed to constantly updating her Real Estate education. 

Licensed in MA and RI...

Al and Cal's primary areas of service Franklin, Bellingham, Medway, Millis, Medfield, Norfolk, Wrentham, Plainville, Blackstone, Walpole, Milford, Holliston, Hopkinton, Mansfield, and Foxboro, North Attleboro, Hopedale, Mendon, Millville but have resourses to help anyone, anywhere....

Her mission....  To exceed your expectations!

Carol-Ann Palmieri
Al and Cal Realty Group


  1. Great piece, Carol-Ann! I find it is just as easy, and better, to neighbor chat with my neighbors directly about how things are going for them and give them space to tell me, or not, about what is happening in their lives.

    Often they volunteer details unasked, the best way to go.l

    Good reminders about ethics and professionalism. I think about analogies to any of the professions like lawyers, doctors, dentists... Tell me about my neighbor's medical situation? Not hardly! :-) It does translate to what professionalism is.

    1. Thanks Deb. It is easy to forget that your "friend" has a duty to another, and it is also easy to have your feelings hurt when someone will not confide in you. One's financial situation is as personal as their medical one and should be guarded by any professional that has access to it.

      Thank you.

    2. Great point Deborah - this type of situation applies to ALL professional positions. It's also important to note that when you are out with your colleagues and tend to talk shop, it might be a good idea NOT too do that or at least mention no names.

      I love the idea of turning the conversation around as many people love to talk about themselves!

  2. Carol Ann - I love this and it is a good reminder to us all. I think I am guilty of this sometimes and know better! But I know when I ask what's going on I'm not looking for intimate details...just want to know "how much"...still unacceptable of me to put people in that position.

    Great piece. Thanks for sharing.

  3. Hi Nancy. Don't get me wrong, we want you to know the important details, just can't talk about the intimate ones. :) Thanks for reading.